Discreet Poem For Invitations

There is no polite way to request cash -- period.

Just tell everyone how badly you want money.

Do we really have to do this all over AGAIN?????
You people are desperate and tacky....

Carolyn why don`t you put in your invitations exactly how much money you want your guests to give you so that they meet your expectations? This will make things much easier for you. You can finance your entire wedding on the pocketbooks of your guests. Perhaps you can even make a profit off of your marriage. You could actually put an invoice in with the invitation and have them turn it in with the card/money. Have a bouncer at the door to rough up anyone who tries to get in without paying the fee.

Also, don`t forget to call up all of your guests and ask them what their total household income is and how much they have in savings so that you know who can afford to give you the most cash. Have an accountant at the door counting the money to be sure that no one stiffs you on their bill and that your books balance. Have the bouncer then watch all of the guests to determine if they are eatting or drinking more than their gift can afford. Old Uncle Bob who tends to eat a bit too much should have to give at least a $100 bucks more than others who are more dainty with their food intake.

Don`t forget to have the dollar dance! What a fantastic way to rake in more cash! Don`t stop at a dollar, have the $10 buck dance, it`s quite popular these days - I hear it`s the best way to mingle with your guests; make them pay to dance with you.

If your accountant reports to you that you haven`t made your 15% profit margin on the event be sure to have someone going around with a jar for tips. This is a tried and true method of ensuring that you don`t get stiffed! This is all about you because you`re the bride and of course everyone owes you! You`re special and have a right to ask money for your wedding! It`s all about you!

Carolyn if you can`t spell discrete correctly then it explains why you think asking for money in a `discreet` manner is ok.

^^^ Amen, sister

Oops, I meant Amen to what Fiona said. But, the spelling police has a good point as well.

Fiona I laughed so hard when I read your post I think I peed my pants.

Well said! Hopefully some of the less tactful brides out there get the point finally!

It is really nice that all of you richy bt***es can sit and talk down to someone who was just looking for some help. Everyone knows that anytime someone gets married the guests bring a bunch of gifts (whether asked to or not). I do not see how it is rude to ask for money anymore than it is to register some place and say I want this toaster and not that one, it is meerly a request for a certain gift. Besides weddings can cost close to $10,000-20,000. Great way to start a life together - In debt. How much of this actually goes to the bride and groom any way. The cost of a wedding comes from paying for everything for the guests - their food, drinks, favors, bla, bla, bla, bla, bla. They should frickin pay something - they are getting a free night out and if they are guests at our wedding the should feel honored to share in your special occasion. So go ahead and ask for money. I guess the best way to do so would be not to register anywhere and people will probably get the clue that you don`t want 3 toasters and a blender. Oh - and if I spelled anything wrong I am truely sorry - but then again I would be giving you something else to b*** about and give you some enjoyment in your meaningless life. Congrads to the person you made the original post.

Ever consider anger management Sheilanicole? You are one twisted lady......

Seriously , no tactful way to ask for money BUT you can let your parents know. Ask them to spread the word when people ask. If they tell people you are buying a house and have all the items you need to furnish it, hopefully they will get the hint. If not, take the extra toaster back and get the cash or something else you can use. I would never tell anyone who gave me an item that I did that though!! Thank them and move on. Be sure to to send those thank you notes ASAP too!

I would hardley consider myself rich. I am 25000 in debt from student loans with 2 more years to go, planning a wedding and helping to pay a mortgage, but as much as I need cash (and boy do i need it - who doesn`t), I would never even dream of telling my guests that in my invites. It is rude and presumptious. The point of an invitation is to request the presence (aka company) of your "guests" at your wedding, not to tell them how much and what present they should give you. If you can`t see that, then maybe you should read a book on ettiquette and learn how much in bad taste it is. NO gift info EVER should go into an invite!

Sheilanicole, do you have any idea how ridiculous you sound? Do you also know how self-centered you come across? You say your guests "should frickin pay for something" and that "they should feel honored to share in your day"....NO they shouldn`t have to pay for anything -- they are GUESTS. Second, YOU should feel honored to have them at your event.

Get over yourself - the sun doesn`t rise and set with you. You have NO CLASS, NO MANNERS, and are uneducated.

Carolyn- with the money you get for your wedding you can spend on an education! Your spelling is horrible and your grammar is even worse. Then again I don`t expect someone who thinks it`s ok to request money in an invitation to have much of an education.

Tacky tacky tacky tacky......

How do you tell people where you are registered at - isn`t that the same thing? And if you $25000 in debt I think you are the one who should be reading more books on how to manage money. And to the person who said that I was uneductaed. I graduate from highschool at 17 went straight to college after that and still am in college at 21 - because I want to be not because I have to be. I also run two business - very well I might add, own my own house, car, and manage my own money - Oh and I am not in debt. Maybe it is because I am not so willing to throw my money away as you so obviously are.

Maybe you could just put in your invitations where you would usually put where you are registered -
Your presence is gift enough but if you would like to give a present a donation towards our memorable day would be most preferred.
I remember someone doing this for a funeral (not that weddings and funerals should be compared) so that she would not get a bunch of flowers that she would not know what to do with.
Just an idea - Good luck to you and yours!!

Sheilanicole, you don`t put registry information (or any mention of gifts) in your invitations. Nor do you announce your registry or gift wishes. Those of your guests who wish to get input on your likes and dislikes will ASK where you are registered. To initiate to your guests any announcement of your gift wants is presumptous and rude.

You may claim to be going to college but you still have no class or manners.

Oh, and prostituation and drug dealing do not count as "running a business".

Some of you "womem" (and I am using that term lightly) amaze me. This is my first day here and I am simply astonished at the way some of you have treated people who are just asking questions!

I came here seeking information and advice and I find that there are a few of you who seem to think you are holier than tho and know everything there is to know. I sure hope you don`t treat your fiance/husband like this.

Some of you should be ashamed of yourselves.