Parents Help Pay For Wedding
Hi there, i need an opinion, I come for a roman catholic faith and usually the parents pay half and half. Ive been battling with my mother for so long now about my wedding. My brother chose to marry in barbados which cost my parents 15,000 to make the wedding possible for him, this includes hotel, air everything now my fiancee and i are having a big wedding (99.9 % family) and his mom is giving us 10,000 for the wedding and all my mom does is complain when i ask her to assist us with the costs, i mention how my brother got what he wanted and it cost 15000 to make it possible but mom always says "but you brother did not get anything out of it!!, this is the stupidiest cope out ever on her part, and to boot she kicked me out of the house when i was 22 and not ready and nothing saved!!,, it cost my finacee 2,000 for the hotel i was staying at and to help me out, i did nothing to her to deserve this, she is an evil women with no friends left!!! and i know this is my wedding but i find it so unfair how she is trying to say that they have no money meanwhile they by big screen tv`s, all this fancy stuff all the time, she is full of sh*t!!! and its making me so unhappy and stessed out!! why cant i be treated like my brother!! i should get the same and to boot my mom never , ever wanted my brother to marry her, she is black and we are italian and she never excepted her and never will. When we first go engaged my mom contacted my fiancee mom to have a engagement party for us and my fiancee mom told my mom that she cant do it!! not sure why but my mom has been upset about this and in a way i understand her point** how can she of said no, i do know that my fiancee brother and sister never go an engagement party so maybe this is why, somebody please help me!!! mom and i are not talking now, she did put pay for some of the dep for my dress and i asked her to help me out more and she coped out again by saying they have no money which is bu*Lshi*T
Posted by tara; updated 04/06/04
Reply
Why is everyone giving you their dumb opinions?.. I think you should check the first line of your opening post. You asked for them!!! If you only wanted people who agreed with you to respond then you should have said that too. We all have them.... You wanted them.. You got them.... Both the good and the bad. Honestly you sound like your getting really upset over something that doesnt desirve this kind of emotional upset. It`s just other peoples opinions and you can take them or leave them.
This is just another opinion and I don`t mean to offend or sound sarcastic in anyway.
Try to stay calm about all this.
Cheers :)
Posted by stacey; updated 04/06/04
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Well everyone has their opinion. My opinion on this issue is mixed. I feel if parents pay for one sibling, of course its only "fair" they pay for the other one. However it all depends on the circumstances. I think huge, expensive weddings appeal mainly to very young women who have low self esteems and want to play Cinderella. I`ve been to some incredibly expensive weddings that were very long and boring. The ceremony was long and dull, there was no alcohol served at the reception, no music, etc. Etc. I know of one girl whose wedding cost about ten grand & her parents paid it, however, she also had huge medical bills that she couldn`t afford later on. This is just sad. Another girl I know had a similar big wedding, her husband cannot support her, they have struggled for years to get by.
Posted by JenSabrine; updated 04/06/04
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Tara,
I don`t know you or your parents, but you asked for opinions. Mine is that I think if you honestly looked at your relationship with your parents, you may find out why they favor your brother. Just by reading your post and follow up comments, I am feeling you are not one to reasonably settle differences.You became angry at people you don`t even know and started name calling etc. I cannot imagine a family discussion when the issues really matter! A family don`t throw out a child as you put it...if that said child is a well adjusted, contributing member of the family. Contributing would not have to mean financially either. On the other hand if you speak to your family as you have to the responders of this post, perhaps you deserve to have been kicked out. I would love to hear the OTHER side of this story! So I think you should be the bigger person here, put this behind you and pay for the wedding you want. If you need to scale it back do so.
Life is too short to carry grudges. Let your parents see that you did it without their help, perhaps it will be the bridge you need to repair that relationship.Right now I`m sure you could care less if you have a relationship with them or not, but some day you will! I wish you the best, and good luck!
Posted by RecentBride; updated 04/06/04
