Cash As Wedding Gift

Amy, it`s rude to put anything in your invitations about gifts. The only purpose of the invitation is to convey how honored you would be for so and so to celebrate with you. The invitation is not a place for you to state your wants and needs. Whether you are rich or poor has nothing at all to do with whether you can mention gifts in your invitations. It`s never nice. It`s never acceptable.

Its poor etiquette.

It is a growing trend for brides to request cash gifts. Rather than putting this wish on your invitation (which never includes registry information anyway), spread the word through your family and wedding party. Another way to let your guests know your preference is on a website (and the url may be included on the invitation). For an example, check out virtuallymarried.com. Good luck!

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I hole-heartedly disagree with the suggestion that suggests that requesting money as a gift is in any way an acceptable request even if it`s through word-of-mouth. There are a couple of reasons for this: If you`re asking for cash, it`s because you need cash to help fund your "TOO EXPENSIVE" wedding, another reason is that some of your guests will want to give you cash, and some of your guests will want to give you presents. The presents heaped on a table at the reception will create a photo opportunity that is symbolic for the love that your guests have for you. A pile of cash at the reception isn`t very photogenic.

When planning a wedding, the first consideration should be to make it affordable. You should not rely on others to help fund your wedding other than the Bride`s and Groom`s parents.

Having said that, I would recommend that you register for gifts that you`d like to receive. You are going to have relatives and friends that are going to give you gifts no matter what your desires are. So you may as well get something that you actually want.

Lastly, I would try to find ways to make your wedding more affordable. The best areas in trimming wedding costs is The Catering, The Photographer, and the Reception Hall.

The Catering....
Rather than having a fully catered meal at the wedding, have a caterer create the food and deliver it in a cafeteria style. That way you won`t have to worry about everyone sending in RSVP`s with their food choice and everyone can pick and choose what they want and go back for seconds.

The Photographer....
It`s hard to skimp on the photographer because quality is a big consideration, but if you were to skimp, the question to ask is how long the photographer is necessary. My suggestion is that you need the photographer at the chruch service but not at the reception. You can designate someone to be the reception photographer and write down on paper some photo opportunities that will probably arise during the reception that you`d like Uncle Vinny to get, such as cutting the cake, or posing for a "farewell wave" just outside the Reception Hall.

The Reception Hall...
This is most definately the area where you can save the most money because it doesn`t matter where you get married, not a single person attending your wedding will care if your reception is held at a fancy hotel or the local park. If you`re spending more than $150 dollars to rent a hall you`re spending too much.

Another thing that you can skimp on at the reception hall is the party favors, rather than spending a bundle on decorating, spend a little. No one will notice the centerpieces at the tables, so don`t spend alot on them, I`m not saying not to decorate the hall at all, just don`t spend more than $200 decorating the hall.

Brian I enjoyed reading your reply. I am planning to get married in June, 2004 and we are on a very tight, tight budget. We want a traditional wedding, but we haven`t been able to save any real money. Do you think it`s possible to have a nice wedding with $1,500 - $2,000 to spend on it. I know that sounds crazy, but we really just don`t have the money to have an extravagant one. Please give me any suggestions you may have. We only have a short time to plan it, but I know it can be done. We were thinking about getting married in Vegas, then coming back to have a reception.

I need some tips, if anyone can give any suggestions, or know who I can contact to find all the real bargains.

Lisa, find a place in town that does wedding packages. Vegas isn`t the only place that has inexpensive wedding packages.

Missy thank you so much for responding. I didn`t know that other places really existed that had the cheap package deals like Vegas does., The reason I wanted to do Vegas at first was that you get your videography and photography included with your package as well as flowers and the whole nine yards. They also let you have up to 60 guests. But of course if I got married here in Los Angeles I would then want to invite everybody, which would be at least 100 to 135 people.

But MIssy what suggestions do you have for me as far as trying to have a cheap but nice reception? I would appreciate any and all advice that you can give me. Also you said that their were places here in LA that had package deals, but are they really as cheap and nice as Vegas? Please give me names and contact information for these places that your speaking of.

Thanks again Missy

You would need to look on the internet under "wedding chapels" in the city you live in. There are some commercial wedding chapels that do reception packages, including the wedding cakes, photography, etc. And the prices vary. There are not many of these, but in a big city, you can find them. It costs less because they don`t have to bring outside caterers in. Commercial wedding chapels are not really churches - they are businesses. They can do really beautiful receptions. For anywhere from $800 to $1200, and up. Depending on how much you want and how many guests you invite. Also if there are any old, historic mansions in your city, they may do weddings. Lot of these places are rented out for big parties also.

I did a search on the internet and there is a place called "Wedgewood" that does wedding packages, its in the Los Angeles/Southern Cal area. I think it may be a country club place. There were lots of other listings, also.

Thanks Missy, I will check out Wedgewood and see what they have to offer. Your advice was much appreciated. Please let me know if you come up with anything else.