Marring Young

Put God in your relationship, do not stray from his word and teachings, pray with your fiance`/husband and things will turn out fine. Jesus is the Answer.

Why would you want to mar somebody you love?

Here`s my opinion. I, too, am 19 and engaged. I will be a month shy of 21 when I get married. However, I do not necessarily think that a young marriage is for everyone. I don`t believe that age is so much of an issue, more so maturity of both persons, how well you know each other, personalities that compliment one another, similar ideas about what you want from life, and of course love are things to be considered. Things you should consider and know before you get married are everyday things that most people don`t think about such as how you will run your finances, will you have a joint checking or keep separate accounts, if its a joint account who will keep the checkbook? How will money be spent? How will that be decided? Who will pay what bills or will one persons salary cover bills and the others cover other expenses? Do you want kids? If so when and how many? What are both of your thoughts on raising kids? Do you both believe in and intend to use similar rearing practices? Obviously things with kids do not come until later but really think about how many married couples fight over how to raise and discipline their kids, it can add a lot of stress and anger to a marriage and make things not only hard on you guys but also the kids. Other things such as where will you live? What type of employment you plan on having? How will yours and his jobs affect your family life? Do you have a plan laid out for your future? I know it sounds like a lot and like stuff that you could figure out later as things come along, but knowing these details before you decide to get married (especially if you are as young as you are, b/c chances are you`re going to change some and you both need to be aware of this and be comfortable and flexible with that) can save you a lot of heart ache later and can even solidify your relationship more because you know that you will work together and you will feel more connected with your fiance because you will know even more about him. So I really think that marriage is something that you really want to make sure you are prepared to enter before you enter no matter how old you are, and that sometimes you may be prepared at a young age and sometimes you may not. It`s hard for us to be objective about ourselves as far as maturity goes so try asking others who you respect for an honest opinion, but be careful not to get defensive if you hear something you don`t like. Basically to be able to have a good marriage I think that you both need to know where you are going but be flexible enough to accept that things might change and you might take detours or change directions completely, but definitely start out with a shared sense of direction. Anyway, hope this helps in someway. Sorry if I`ve gone on and on and on, but I think that this is something of importance that warrants it. Anyway, good luck with whatever you choose whether it be to forge ahead as planned or to wait a little longer til you have a better sense of where you two are going in life, i`m sure you`ll make the decision that is right for you.

Misty, you`ve posted this same darn thing tons of times. Stop already!

Steph,
She is not posting it over and over again. What happens is that when 20 people post under a one post, with the 21st person, it starts a new one with the original post only.....

I`m 19 getting married two weeks after my 20th birthday. If you think you are ready do it what the worst that can happen. Millions of people have made marriage mistakes BUT if you know in your heart he is the one GO FOR IT and to hell with everyones opionons it`s your life

I too am 19 and engaged...I will be 20 when I get married. Both my parents and my fiance`s parents got married young as well (younger than me!) and they all have great marriages. I agree that getting married young isn`t right for some people, but if you are mature enough, financially stable etc, then go for it and who cares what everyone else thinks.

Sharon, it`s obvious you are WAY too young and immature to handle marriage. You can`t put a sentence together to save your life and your statement about "If you think you are ready do it what the worst that can happen" just shows how NOT ready for marraige you truly are at this point in your life.

Not to get into a petty spat with you maddie but if you think someones typing ability has anything to do with someones marriage maturity than you my friend need to think long and hard.

Again, you are showing your age. The statement you made showed how unprepared for marriage you truly are-- the fact that you can`t put a sentence together is just icing on the cake. It`s the content, not just the poor sentence structure. You`re too foolish and naive to see the big picture.

Ummm... Maddie, first of all Sharon wasnt asking your opinion or anyone elses about her getting married. Secondly who are you to be calling anybody fools or immature? You don`t know her. So maybe you should be shutting up and showing some maturity yourself.

Who asked you what you thought Mary? No one asked for your opinion. Sharon`s making a big mistake and most people see that -- she`ll be divorced in 3 years.

Oh, I am sorry Maddie. I wasn`t aware you were psychic. Of course they will be divorced in 3 years, what in the world was I thinking???? Silly of me to try to give someone the benefit of the doubt. Next time I will try to be much more pessimistic.

Maddiy i dont know who tinkled in your cornflakes but you need to get over what ever guy hurt your feelings bc if i am married or divorced in three years that is my business and my husbands not some pessimistic sadistic bored old lady hell bent on hurting other people becasue she isnt content with her own life.

Maddie just so you know i turned you in to the editor. The stuff that you say is uncalled for. You are rude and judgemental. No one comes here to be made fun of. Its because of people like you that people stop coming to these types of web sights. I hope that you make yourself happy when you make fun of others when it is not called for.


Have a nice day:)

Oh boo hoo...I`m so sad I could cry. Can`t you people write articulate sentences? What a bunch of ignorant fools.

Oh and you think that boo hoo is the smart or mature thing to write?

Why are cassie and maddie fighting it has nothing to do with the post. Cassie is right though Maddie is rude. Maddie hon get a shrink. You should stop being so rude and judgemental. What right do you have to call someone a fool? Were all in the same boat.

There is nothing wrong with getting married early. I am 16 and ill turn 17 on Aprl 25. And my boyfriend and I are talking about marriage. I love him to death. Even though we`re not getting married right away, btu yes if you want to get married (at no matter what age your at) then go for it. Your the only person who knows exactly how you feel for him and if you think its going to work, then show everyone it will. I wish yall the best of luck and a happy life together.

I think most of us at age 16 would have said that too, Jenn. But we`re all grown up now and realize that age is definitely significant and that there is much more than just love and "how you feel" when considering marriage.

No not everyopn at age 16 would have said that. I know how i feel about him and he does me to. My sister was 16 when she got pregnant and married, now 9 years later their the happiest people on this earth. And yea not all realtionships are like that but they will be if u put ur all into them.

I was married at 19, I dated my husband for almost 2 years prior to our wedding. I had a daughter from a previous relationship and my husband, boyfriend at the time took care of her as if she where his own. I was in love with him, and wanted to create a familly. After he proposed(he was 20) the wedding preparations and excitement were all that I dreamed about, and we had the dream wedding. However after the wedding was over both of us expected the other to change, not that we realized that before the wedding . We had been living together for the time that we were dating. But after we bought the house, we had the wedding and got over that part of our lives things have beeen difficult. Only our expectations of eachouther changed, and not for the better. It has taken and will take twice as much time to build a strong marraige than it did to plann our wedding. Make sure that you focus on both as you plan for your day, because that day will be the shortest day in all of your life! And the younger you marry, the longer and more work you will have to work on you and your new husband`s relationship. Make sure you are marrying for the marraige, not the day that you have been fatizizing about since you were a little girl!

Hey ladies, I am a 17 year old guy (i dont know if i`m allowed to post:-))but im going to because I am getting married in two weeks to the most beautiful, smart, and most awsome girl in the world. I believe that only you know when that perfect person comes along, no one can tell you otherwise. The only thing I would encourage you to do is not be afraid to go through some hard times and test the relationship. That is a huge key in knowing everything about your other half. Well I wish all of you the best of luck in life. Peace out