WHAT DO I DO

I`m in the same boat, kind of. I asked my two best friends from high school be my maids of honor. They were so excited and talked so much about my wedding, helping me pick out my dress and they looked at bridesmaid dresses for me. Then all of a sudden they just both kind of disappeared, I have no idea where they live, a phone number.....and they probably have no clue that I moved. I contacted their parents but have not heard from them. I`m a little torn because I`m completely mad at them for just ditching me and sad because I miss them. Nothign is done and my weddign is in August. I have my two toher bridesmaids, my cousin whom I grew up with and am very close to (but is now recovering from a bad car accident so I can`t really push her for help) and my other childhood friend whom I`m close to. They both do their best to help me or consol me. MY problem is, I don`t know who to make maid of honor now, and wether or not my maid of honors and I will reconnect. If that is the case, they will be upset if they are not still maid of honors. But how would I know if they`d even show up? It`s just crazy. So basically, you have the right to be mad at your friends because your maid of honor is an upstanding role, the person whom you can rely on the most, who is always there for you and who will be the one to say "friend, you are working to much, let me take care of this part for you. Relax beautiful, it`s your day and it`s gonna be perfect!" and you beleive her because you know you can.

I would be angry at her, due to the time factor. However, do not let it spoil your day. By her not being in the wedding, you now are able to have your cousin who has been helping and who you have wanted to be the maid of honor all along. I would simply leave it alone. Do not put your energy into her any longer. If she brings it up again, simply tell her (honestly) she has let you down as a friend but you are bigger than that and would still like her to come.

Erica i really wouldn`t care if they came back and were disappointed they weren`t maid of honor. I made my cousin maid of honor because one i am really close with her and two she has helped me a lot and that is what a maid of honor does. So i would make whoever has helped you maid of honor or whoever you think deserves the title. Thanks for the advice. :)

Michelle
Thats what i was thinking, but im just gonna invite her, nobody else. She knows we are on a budget and the person she wanted to bring is rude and inconsiderate and we don`t like him. I know it sounds rude but if you met him you would know why. But the bigger thing to do is to invited her anyways and if she shows she shows and if not then its her decision. Thanks for the advice.

Melissa

I am getting married this June, and I ran into a similar situation. I had a great friend, whom I considered her, my best friend. We had known each other for 7 years, about the same time I have been together with my fiancé. When it came down to it, to help plan my wedding she began to flake. She was too busy or just did not get back to me with the things we had talked about. This went on for about 4 months. What did it for me was when we were suppose to go try on wedding dresses and she apparently forgot, even though we planned a full day, 3 days prior, then she has the edacity to tell me to call her when I am being rational.( Because I was upset with her, which I had every right to be) I was really upset and hurt and at this point. It was the last straw, so I told her that I did not feel our friendship was as important to me than I thought. REAL friends do not do that to you, especially during the most important days of your life. As far, as if you should invite her, I would say NO! You do not want her there! She may ruin it somehow. Just simply tell her that you do not have enough money to pay for her plate:) Your budget is in. Really though, you find out who your true friends are, and she does not sound like a true friend if anything, she sounds jealous. Can you tell I am bitter about this;)? Anyway, I have never been married before but I did have a daughter when I was 18. She is now 10 years old she is going to be my maid of honor:). This was the best decision of any of my wedding plans. You want to have someone that will be there for you no matter what and your whole life. It should be someone you know in your heart. The biggest mistake was feeling obligated to ask my so called friend to be my maid of honor, but in a way it was a blessing because it made me see her true colors. Good Luck P.S Sorry for Rambling