Outdoor Wedding - Children

Hi- I`m having a similar problem. My fiance and I are paying for our wedding ourselves. We are planning to invite 125 people. If we accounted for all of their children, thats another 65 people!! So, we decided that we couldn`t invite all kids. So we toiled with the idea of just close family bringing their kids, but if you do that, be prepared for a huge backlash. There are going to be people who are "offended" by this. One aunt might wonder why her kids couldn`t come, but so and so from his family got to bring theirs, blah blah blah. We have decided to not have children at all. It is a hard decision to make, but we just can`t swing it financially. And we have already notified the kids and their parents and explained our situation.

If you don`t want to exclude some guests why not think about hiring a "child wrangler" - I`m sure you could find a neighbor teen who would watch the kids for $50 or so... That way parents can sort of still keep an eye on their kids, but not have to be so preoccupied...
Plus caterers usually only charge 1/2 price for kids ... So cost wise you may be okay...

I would consider having a few people to help with the children, and do a large picnic area for the kids. Have your caterer make something kid friendly and inexpensive for them. You can put some baskets of coloring books and crayons out as well to keep them busy. Just a thought-Jenifer

In my opinion, it`s gotta be ALL children or NO children. The only "child" at my wedding was my husband`s son - he was in the wedding. And it was an outdoor wedding. People do not find it rude if you say "no children please" but if they get there (after they`ve made plans to get a sitter) and they see other children there - that won`t go over too well.

I had a friend who`s brother got married and had some family members` children in their wedding ceremony and then they were told the children were NOT invited to the reception and the reception/wedding were out of state. They had the added expense of renting a hotel room and dropping their kids off there (in between wedding and ceremony) with a sitter.

Children can be a big issue. I say - all or nothing. Don`t chose who`s children can come and who`s can`t.

Good luck!!
Krissy

Thanks so much for all your replies! I am still completely torn! My 10 yr old daughter is going to be my maid of honor so she will be there expecting to see her cousins, at least, to play with for the day. Our close cousins are 10, 11, 13 and older. But then we have friends, not family, who have children, with some families have 4 children. These mostly range in age from 1 to 6. We are hoping/thinking it would be ok to invite these older family children and not the younger friends children, but if they bring them that is fine too! I would love to chat more if anyone has ideas or opinions - please send me an email or give your email address.
Thanks!
Jesnifer73@aol.com

I`m going to say something which is quiet unpopular with certain brides-- I do not think children (anyone under the age of 15) belong at weddings - period. For those of you disagree, that`s fine, it`s your opinion and for your wedding, pack in the kids.

I`ve been to too many weddings where the parents do not discipline their children and they run wild and raise a ruckus. Jennifer, you indicated you are concerned that your adult guests will be too busy disciplining their children to enjoy themselves -- yes, this is true for most parents. However, at the same time you may have a handful (maybe your friends are not like this but I`ve seen it enough to believe it happens at almost all weddings) who do not bother to watch their children at weddings and all hell breaks loose.

My recommendation would be to not invite any children.

Good luck and I hope everything turns out well for you.