Help!! Mother Of Bride Dress
My future mother in law has been shopping around for a dress for a while, and the other day she called to tell me that she found one. She told me that it was like a creme/mauve color, she said that it was NOT white or ivory it was darker than that.so i thought that it wouldbe ok. But today she showed it to me and it is almost white, you wouldn`t know that it wasn`t white unless it was up against my diamond white dress. From what i understand the bride is the only one who is suppossed to wear white. His mother is very sensitive and if i say anything it might hurt her feelings, eventhough it is not something to get upset about. And i know that my fiance wont say anything to her. She did say she is still looking for dresses and she just bought that one b/c she liked it and it was the last one. So should i tell her that i would like if she found a dress in a different color or should i just let her keep looking and hope she finds something else and if not just let it go. I know it isn`t that big of a deal but i only have 6 weeks till the wedding and everything is stressing me out. Please help.
Posted by Stephanie; updated 01/27/04
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Convince her to eat a lot. Eventually she wont be able to fit in it anymore! j/k
Be careful about that because it may even look more white depending on the lighting in your ceremony site. Perhaps this is a nice way to suggest a darker color?
Posted by Gina; updated 01/27/04
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Stephanie,
A bride "in white" simply doesn`t matter as much as it once did. And even that importance in our culture is itself quite recent. White wedding gowns didn`t become fashionable until Queen Victoria wore white in the 1800s. And in other cultures, "traditional" colors might still be red or gold.
Moreover, white took on an association w/ a virginity expected of the bride but not at all of most grooms.
So ... Unless you closely identify your own wearing of white w/ its virginal significance, or its Victorian origin, or just its recent traditional use, please don`t worry so much about this matter. Really.
Other considerations.
... You can`t control all your guests` colors, & you may find others wearing variations of white.
... If you`re concerned because of posed photos w/ your immediate families, trust this: it`s going to be very obvious who the radiant bride is!
... And it`s unlikely your FMIL`s dress will look "bridal".
More important is putting this one day of your lives into the prospective of an ongoing relationship with your family & friends. If your FMIL loves this dress, try to love it w/ her! For, at your wedding, you likely won`t even notice it at all. Heck, you`ll probably notice no one`s attire then, unless someone shows up buck-naked!
I`ve been through it all, as a 1st-time 43 year-old bride 5 years ago
Good luck!
Bonnie
Posted by Bonnie; updated 01/27/04