Bridesmaid Back Outy Get Invite
I have 2 bridesmaids that dropped out of my wedding 2 months before my wedding. One of my bridesmaids talked to my 3 1/2 year old flowergirl in a way that made her cry. So I said before the wedding I wanted to get everyone together to make sure we wouldn`t have an issue with her. My flower girl needs to be as comfortable as possible the day of the wedding. Well my bridesmaid said that was the most rediculous thing she has ever heard and refused and I shouldn`t insult her intergrity becuase of a 3 year old. Then said maybe it was best if she backed out to make everyone more comfortable. I personally think it was a money issue. The other bridesmaid always follows everything this girl does but she tried to retract her statement the next day but to me a true friend would never even think of backing out for any reason once she accepted. Do we still have to send them an invite? I haven`t spoken to them in almost a month and don`t plan on anytime soon. The Invites go out this weekend and I don`t know what proper thing to do is.
Posted by Lisa; updated 12/31/03
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I would send them each one if I were you. I don`t think that they deserve one, but by completely leaving them out you would be lowering yourself to their level.
Posted by Erika; updated 12/31/03
Reply
Hi, Lisa --
I`d decide depending on honest self-responses to 2 questions first:
(1) Do you want a continued relationship w/ these women? If "maybe", begin to lean "yes". If "doubtful", lean towards a "non".
(2) If they show up, are they likely to disseminate the story about "How we were supposed to be BMs, but Lisa ..." (fill in the blanks). If likely, lean "no". If not, lean "yes".
Then tally the results.
Let me tell you a story. The day before we were to perform a wedding ceremony, we met the bride at the church she had rented. Rose was in tears. The night before, her fiance had told the MOH not to light up a cigarette in Rose`s house. The MOH was truculent, trying to pull Rose into siding w/ her against Rose`s FH. When Rose refused, the MOH threatened not only to pull out of the wedding, she demanded the money back that was spent on the dress! And now, on the wedding`s eve, the issue wasn`t yet settled.
In the end, the MOH played her part. But at the reception, she infuriated Rose by getting too tipsy, insulting all the waiters, & sending food back to the kitchen.
Lesson: resentments forged prior to a wedding just might haunt the couple during them!
Regards,
Bonnie
Posted by Bonnie; updated 01/01/04
