Parents Refuse Wedding!

I started dating my fiancee in November 2005. Yes, I admit I moved into his place very quick (Spring 2006). He proposed November 2007. We have been in a holding pattern ever since.
Nothing is wrong it just seems everytime mention getting married the wedding plans get blown WAY out of proportion. I want a quiet simple wedding and his family is huge! My parents have never pressured us to get married or not. They like my fiancee and get along good with him. However, they have never said they would pay for anything either. I know that they are not rich but there is money there. If we were to have a traditional wedding I do not think it is fair to me to be "forced" to invite their friends and feed them all.
SOOOO...I came up with the idea to go on a vacation and get married in the south. Well, I presented the idea this week-end and I got a couple of very nasty comments. First, my father said that he is saving his money to buy a piece of property in another part of the country. I said so you are saying that is more important than attending my wedding...He said yes, he would NOT be attending my wedding. My mother said that it would cost her about $3000 dollars. She said if I was going to hold it against her if she did not go then she would drug herself and get on a plane and attend. However, she thinks a better idea would be to give me the money and she would not attend. Both of them think we should just go to a judge and get married and tell them after it is all done. HIS parents say there is NO WAY that is happening!
Help Me....I am back in a holding pattern. What should I do? I am seriously thinking of finding a phycologist to talk to...I think all this wedding talk on driving me nuts.