Children At Dinner After Being In The Wedding

My two kids are going to be in the wedding and I have already arranged my older sister to watch them for the dinner, 6 hours after the wedding.

Now I am being told by my husband that his mother is telling him that our children are suppose to be at the dinner. I am trying to keep my cool, but I don`t think it is fair or healthy for my 2.5 yearold and my 5 year old to be at a dinner reception.

The grandmother is saying it is tradition and if I do not go along with the family I am being disrpectul. The bride and groom can care less, but because of the culture I am being disrepectful toward the grandmother. Of course my husband would never go against his mother.

Any suggests I will be more then happy to take.

Nancy
Posted by Nancy; updated 08/25/03

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Why is it not healthy for children to be at a wedding dinner? I`ve seen plenty of young children at wedding receptions. I`m not sure from your post what you are so concerned about.
Posted by Hanna; updated 08/25/03

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I totally agree that is not healthy for your 2.5 year old to be at a dinner reception. It will probably be very late into the evening and children need their sleep. And there will probably be alcohol there as well, again not healthy. But bottom line, they are your children and if you don`t want them somewhere then they should not be there.
Posted by Carri; updated 08/26/03

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I still don`t get all this "unhealthy" stuff. The children won`t be drinking and staying up later than normal for one special occasion isn`t going to kill them. And this isn`t a frat party with kegs and people running around getting drunk and wild. It`s a wedding! It`s nothing new for children to be at a wedding reception, especially if they are in the wedding party. In almost every wedding I`ve been to there have been children and the children in the wedding party never go home after the ceremony. I don`t see what the big deal is. But you`re right, it is your decision as their mother. I just think you are making a mountain out of a molehill. Maybe as a compromise they can come in with the wedding party when they are announced (and look all cute!) - this will be fun for them. Then stay for dinner and a few dances and then have the babysitter take them home early. Isn`t that a good compromise?
Posted by Hanna; updated 08/26/03

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Thank you for everyones reply, I am probably making a mountain out of a molehole, but I forgot to mention the wedding party is 35 and the dinner will be hosting 1000. I have given into my inlaws and told my husband that both our children can go. If my kids do fall apart the inlaws will have to watch them and I can tell my husband, "I told you so." Wish me luck.
Posted by Nancy; updated 08/26/03

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Good luck. And in a crowd of 1000 people, don`t trust anyone to watch your children but you, not even his parents. Say I told you so and take lots of pictures!
Posted by Jewel; updated 08/28/03