Children At Weddings
I cannot believe the ignorance of so many people today when it comes to manners and etiquette!
A wedding is NOT as Suzi said, a backyard barbeque; it is more like a stage production which takes enormous amounts of planning and effort to have it come out smoothly. People should realize this...maybe they will when they have to plan their own or their child`s.
When you receive an invitation, it is for a slpecial event and that invitation will specify EXACTLY who the wedding giver is inviting. If they want your children, it will say `& Family` on the envelope. If it doesn`t say this, don`t even THINK of bringing your children. You either get a sitter for the day or evening, or you don`t go!
People have to realize that every seat in that reception hall has a price on it. Do they realize that the wedding giver may be paying 50 or more dollars for that person sitting there?
(There`s usually a reduction in price for children under a certain age, but still cost goes according to head count.) Who really wants to pay $20.00 for a friends 5 year old that won`t even sit in the chair, never mind eat!
I believe children under a certain age should not be present at a wedding. They may cry and fuss in the church, they may run wild at the reception. If a child is not old enough to sit down, walk, not run, know when to be quiet, then they do not belong at a wedding ceremony or reception. The only exception is if the couple marrying have a children of their own and want them in attendance or if the wedding and reception takes place at a home or outdoors.
Posted by Miss Priss; updated 08/24/03
Reply
People who don`t have kids or are getting married outside can have children too. I agree that it isn`t polite to bring your children if they aren`t stated on the invite, however, just because a couple chooses to include children in their wedding doesn`t mean they are daft or stupid. For example, we are including children in our wedding although we don`t have any ourselves. My nieces and nephews mean a great deal to me and just because they are under the age of 10 doesn`t make them any less a part of the family. If your family or friends have any tact themselves, they would make arrangements such as a sitter to care for the kids during the reception so that if they did act up, they could be taken away. Most children (yes, even toddlers) if talked to about what is going on will behave. When my sister got married, we talked to my nephew beforehand for weeks, allowed him to participate in practices and included him in all the excitement. He was 4 years old and behaved wonderfully (oh, and he has ADHD too), so this goes to show how children can behave. If you bring them into any situation without explaining what is entailed, they are bound to run amok. Alos, the b&g can help as well by providing activities for the children such as colouring books, crayons, childrens` dances (hokey pokey, chicken dance, etc. ) , masybe even another joined room for movies and such. Certainly, the decision to include children is a personal one, however, it gives no one on the opposite side of the fence a right or reason to put down someone else`s decision.Weddings are beautiful not because of all the planning and time spent trying to make it the event of the year, but because of all the love. If you focus on this, nothing will ruin your day.
Posted by voice of reason; updated 08/25/03
