A Little Upset... My MOTHER!!

I can see your mother`s point of view,but,I also see yours.Most mothers(I think) would be flattered that you would want to hold a wedding on their property.Perhaps you may mention that the dogs could stay in the house during the event or maybe she board them for a few hours. Hope these ideas help.

I have already told her to keep them inside the house.. She already said she would never board them any where...
I thought that being her ONLY daugther, this would be something special to her.. Maybe not...

Holly

Sounds as if you are a little spoiled being her "ONLY" daughter. Listen to you-- "What is her problem?" "What can I do to get her to say yes?" I think that if your mom doesn`t want to host your wedding in her big backyard than that is her perogative. You should be a good daughter and respect her decision. Just because you don`t like her choice to not have a bunch of people in her backyard...setting up tents, tables, using her bathroom...etc doesn`t mean that she isn`t excited about you getting married.

Spoiled? Umm you do NOT know me.. You certainly do NOT know what my life was like as I was growing up...
No I am not spoiled.. I believe the word spoiled means * GETTING what ever it is you ask for* Is it not? Because that has never happened through out my life.
And NO She is NOT happy about my wedding.. She has asked me a few times already to RETHINK my wedding...

Holly

Besides.. IM SURE that if she were the ONE paying for this wedding she would have said yes to hosting this in her BIG back yard... BUT because she is NOT paying for this wedding *AT ALL* She could care less where I have it as long as its not in her yard...

This is the LEAST she could do for me since I am choosing to Travel to her State to have this wedding.. As she lives in the state of CT.. I am in VA.. Because she asked me I decided to have it there so the family does NOT have to travel all the way down here...

I`m not the same Ann as above...

Holly you are always so quick to jump on the defensive in these posts.

HOWEVER, I kind of agree with you on this one. Sounds like your mom is being kind of lazy. Doesn`t want to board the dogs for a few hours, doesn`t want to travel to her daughter`s wedding, doesn`t want to help out saving expenses for you by allowing the wedding in her backyard. Are your parents married? If so, what does Dad think about this?

I`m sure you`ve already played the angle..."I`m having the wedding near you so you and the fam don`t have to travel, and I`m paying for this myself. Could you help me save some cash by hosting the wedding in your backyard?" You can try to reason with her but from the sounds of it she`s not going to budge so you might want to just start shopping around. If you argued about it so much that she finally caved in then it would be a source of stress more than joy, you know what I mean? She`d have the opportunity to throw everything back in your face before, during, and after (tent stakes hurting the lawn, toilet getting clogged, dog getting fleas at the kennel). And if it rained...Whoa! You`d probably never hear the end of the mud being tracked into the house.

Holly, the more I type the more I think you should just let it go. I know you`re frustrated and rightfully so but it could turn into the worst nightmare rather than the greatest day of your life because of your mom.

This is to the first Ann that posted......as an only child,therefore being an only daughter myself,I do not believe Holly is acting spoiled. I don`t know why in the world alot of people think just because you may be an only child or an only child of a certain sex, that you are spoiled rotten. I,too,did not get everything I wanted.Although,I was not the type anyway to try and get everything while growing up. We were VERY poor and I understood that. But people need to start realizing that just because you may be an only child,does not guarantee that you are spoiled.

You are not spoiled, and you certainly aren`t supported. So invite her to your wedding, but don`t involve her in the planning or ask for anything else (and if she offers anything- think twice before accepting).

As she is thinking about her comfort (and her dogs`) think about yours. If you are having it in CT just for family and not because you really want it there- don`t.
Surround yourself with people who are supportive. His family, your friends, ect. Who knows? maybe you could find a park that`s free and much prettier than any backyard.

You and your fiance could offer to pay for the dogs to stay at the "doggie motel" (kennel) for the night.

Ladies!

Thanks for your help... I have already offered to put them in the Kennel... She doesnt want them out of her site..

I was looking around with my maid of Honor yesterday and we found a park.. *My mom doesnt want the reception there, but oh well* The cost for the rental is 75 Dollars.. I cant reserve until Jan. 2, 2004.. So I hope I make it..
ITs a closed pavillian NEAR a lake and a waterfall! So its great... Im not sure what to do for Food because its a grill... So maybe a BBQ would work.. Just a Picnic Reception type of thing..

Again! Thanks for the help!

Holly

Sounds like Mom is going to try to be a damper on your special day. If she keeps it up, have it where you live instead. It sounds like she doesn`t want you to get married and is going to try to be a road block where ever possible. Stop trying to please her and please yourself.

You can always hire a caterer for the food.

Gees, i hope it all works for you, i have to say your mum sounds like she is the mum from hell, i cannot believe she is stressing about her two dogs!!!! This is her daughters wedding, maybe im wrong but i am a mum myself i would do anything for my children, specially my daughter on her wedding day, and my dog would come second best not first, gees its a shame your mum is like that, i feel for you, hope everything works well for your big day, cheers

Kylie,

Just wanted to say thank you.. Thank you for understanding my point of view... As an above poster thought, I was a spoiled brat.. Yet when I go to even VISIT the family for a few weeks *go once a year to CT* I am not allowed to stay at her house because of her DOGS... I need to stay with relatives.. NOT my own Mother... Which is a shame.. I really want my father to give me away so I am having thet weddding in CT per their request.. I just wish *like you stated* my mom would not worry about her dogs for ONE day.. If anything they can stay in the OPEN basement they have.. But its ok! I found a place where it will cost 75 dollars.. Works for me.. Not expensive and near a water fall and a lake.. Great for pictures.. :)

Thanks again!!

PS.. Your daughter is lucky to have a mother like you!!

Holly