Relationship With Bride Strained Over Guest.

Honey, first thing I have to say is your friend is being a brat! Just because it is her wedding, she doesn`t have the right to tell you that you can`t have your boyfriend come with you. If I were you, I would not be in her wedding. It`s thoughtful of you to not want to put her in that position, but how thoughtful is she being to you? I just got married 2 months ago and THREE of my groomsmen backed out! One of them backed out the week of the wedding! And I worked around it and filled in the holes...just like she can. And when she says to you " You can`t change your mind now. You said you`d be in this wedding." You say " You also said I could invite my boyfriend if I had one when the wedding rolled around. You changed YOUR mind...why am I not entitled to change mine?" I know it seems like a childish thing to do, but think about how childish she is being! And it may work out for the best. She will not want you to back out and will probably agree to let your boyfriend come. If not, don`t worry about it. What kind of friend would punish you because she has two guy friends that opened their mouths too late? She is not being considerate of you or your feelings at all! Her two guy friends are not the ones you want to be with that night. And the way I see it, you aren`t going to be uncomfortable there, your boyfriend`s not going to be uncomfortable there...who is? The two guys right? So maybe they should not come!!! Them guys have no right to be jeolous....they didn`t speak when they should have and you are with someone else. And think about this......she is chosing the two guys feelings over yours. The guys will be uncomfortable and jeolous so your boyfriend can not come by "order of the bride". But what about your feelings? What about the fact that you are going to be uncomfortable at a wedding where two guys have a crush on you and you are without your boyfriend? Just think about all I`ve said and good luck in whatever you decide to do. A.C.

I would tell her that it is rude to uninvite people. If she refuses to allow your boyfriend to attend, i would leave him at home and attend the ceremony only. Tell her that if he isn`t welcome at the reception then you don`t feel welcome either. Skip the reception if her selfish attitude persists. I am a bride and i would never dream of not inviting a bridesmaids "other half". Ettiquette states that couples should receive a joint invitation. She is being rude.

Oh, and by the way, the only one responsible for their feelings are themselves. You have no control over their feelings and if they are going to be jealous they are going to be whether your honey is there or not.

I agree- Just tell her you are out- If those guys are so important, they can be bridesmaids. " As selfish as I want " is scary- run, who knows where that will stop? Maybe she will assign you a date and require that you go home with him?

I agree the bride is being childish, but if you`re bothered by this already, you will probably be bothered more if you bow out. It sucks, but my advice is to take the high road, be in the wedding as you agreed, but don`t stick around afterwards or go to anymore trouble, and don`t put yourself out for her again until she`s ready to act like a real friend again and apologize for how she`s treated you.