FLOWER GIRL..HOW OLD?

Congratulations on the small garden ceremony, I am also having one, with no attendants and no circus.

Stand your ground. It`ll just snowball if you don`t. It`s almost as hard to keep a wedding simple as it is to pay for a big (complicated) one.

Your niece will can still wear a pretty dress and your mom can get a picture of her throwing (insert your favorite toss here) after the ceremony or playing with wedding bubbles.

I`m kinda in a similar situation. My 7 year old neice is going to me my flower girl but neither my fiance or me have any young boys in our family. My sister wants me to use my nephew as the ring bearer but he is only about 18 months old. He is my neice`s little brother so she seems to think that he will walk down the isle with her. I think that it is big mistake trying to have toddlers in a wedding. They will only get scared and will not go. I would soon just not have one at all, and have my neice walk by her self. I just see more of a problem with having my nephew in the wedding that just having one flower girl and no ring bearer.
My advice to you is stand your ground, do things the way you want and if you make someone mad they`ll get over it. This is what I`m going to do, I know that my sister is going to be mad, but the way I look at it is it won`t be the first time I`ve done something to make her mad and I know it probably won`t be the last, she`ll get over it.

I have worked in the daycare business, and I believe you should stand your ground. That is way too young. You will end up in a situation where she either freezes and someone has to push her down the aisle, she sees her mom and runs straight to her, or she will flat out refuse to walk down the aisle. If you`re lucky enough to get her down the aisle, once there, she will never stand there, may pull her skirt over her head, or do the potty-dance the entire time. And then there is the famous jumping and waving while yelling "HI MOM!!!" throughout the entire ceremony. This is your special day and it should be YOU who is the center of attention. If you think sending her down the aisle would avoid hurt feelings and prevent a family feud, then there are two things you can do to try to make it disaster proof.
(1) Go against traditional processional order and send one of the bridesmaids (maybe your maid of honor) down the aisle after her, so that if she gets stuck or suddenly freaks out, the maid of honor can take her by the hand or if all else fails, carry her down the aisle. Once she gets there, have her mom sitting in the front row with a seat reserved for the flowergirl so that she can sit with mom and be supervised rather than jumping around the alter. That way you get to be the center of attention for the ceremony, but the little princess still gets to go down the aisle and no one is mad at you.

Good luck!!

How old is too old? I`ve always been told 10 was too told....I`m already married(3 years in June) and I had my cousins who were both 7 at the time and now a friend of mine is getting married and she wants to use her sister who is 13 as a flower girl, I`ve told her that its too old but I didn`t know for sure how old was too old.

I think 10 is probably at or near the cut off point for flower girls - however, many people are starting to use girls in this age range as "junior bridesmaids" - having them wear similar gowns to the bridesmaids (at least the same color) and also walking down the aisle in the same fashion.

You know as far as young children go, it really depends on the child and there`s never a guarentee that things will go exactly as planned. A seven year old is just as likely to freak out as a two year old. Every child develops differently, and has a different personality and temperament, if you are going to consider having a young flower girl or ring bearer then you need to really consider the child in question. Also, as someone else suggested, if you are using a child in your ceremony (i don`t care what age) you really should have their parents in the front row so that they can go sit down rather than having to stand there the whole time, especially if you are planning a long ceremony. Anyway, the point is, do what is right for you, but have realistic expectations. If you are someone who wants everything to be absolutely perfect and go on without a single hitch then don`t have her as a flower girl. However, if you are someone who is more relaxed about the ceremony and you can laugh when the little girl decides not to go and be okay with her running to her mom and say "aw how cute" then go for it have her as your flower girl. (one note to that, if she is a very fussy little kid then don`t even bother, like I said you have to consider temperament).

As for the seven year old neice and 18 month nephew, you could have your neice pull your nephew in a wagon, but really a ring bearer is not necessary so make whatever decision is right for you.

Thanks, you helped me and my friend alot....I just wanted to say no matter how old the flower girl is there will most likely be a problem...When me and my cousin were 8 and 9 we were flower girls for our cousin Christy and well Tina(my cousin[8yr old]) fell and dropped all of her flowers and started to pick them up so I stopped and helpped her but none of it was caught on tape all you could hear was a loud thud as she hit the ground but Christy didn`t even notice and nobody else really did either except my Aunt who rush over and picked us up....so just keep in mind things happen all the time that brides never even notice.