Bachlor Party??

Girl, that`s every Bride-to Be`s pet peeve. You know you could have a Bachelorette Party. You think men`s parties are touchy-touchy- go to a male strip club. The women are crazy there. Men aren`t allowed to touch the female strippers, but women can touch the male strippers. There`s a double standard. I wouldn`t worry too much about your soon-to-be having a bachelor party. It`s one last night of man crap and questionable behavior. Really, it`s not that bad. Most men actually end up appreciating and respecting the Brides even more for the whores they aren`t. As long as there is no kissing, fondling, or sex- be it good. It`s not like they will drag him to a brothel. Hopefully, you are nowhere near Reno. Now if your fiance truly doesn`t want one that`s another story. He will have to make it known that he doesn`t want one. If you`re marrying this guy- i assume you trust him. So, if you do you`ll have the confidence in knowing it`s just stupid guy fun. But-really you might want your own little Girl`s Night Out. It`s only fair, right? Don`t be surprised though if your man comes home in a drunken stupor. That`s to be expected. Bottom line- one night of stupid guy fun- and then an eternity loving you, being with you, and growing old with you. It`s sweet, so don`t let the bachelor party ruin that. It`s harmless really.

My man is a sweetheart, but hes also the kinda guy that dont know when to stop when he should. I know this for a fact if hes lead on he will do something. Hes a BIIGGGG TIME flirt .plus, when he drinks hes hes wayy loose if you know what i mean.
I just have a feeling something will happen and i will not forgive him.
Also, he said i cant have a stripper....not that i would want one..why have one if you only desire one person.
Ha ha i said he could have a old lady stripper.he just looked at me.
Im really protective if you cant tell.
Thank you for your responce =0)

Well, there you go. If he came out and said you can`t have a stripper- either can he. What` good for one is good for the other. He has no room to talk. If his friends continue to be mad at you. Bring up the fact that he said you couldn`t. Also, if he doesn`t have that much self control when he has a few drinks- why would he even want to put himself in a position that could lead to a mass of mistakes? In his case, he shouldn`t have one. Depending on his guys friends- if they respect the soon to be marriage plans they would make sure he didn`t cross those lines. But- on the other hand he may have the kind of friends who egg on the bad behavior. I don`t know. It`s your call. You know his history better than I do. If you feel strongly about it, like it sounds you do, talk to him about it. You should go out that night. You don`t need to go to strippers- but you don`t have to tell him that. If he does end up getting a party, I would seriously consider your own thing. It`s kind of like a "Okay, how does it make you feel?" I don`t know, he may understand. All I can say is that if you don`t go out and have some of your own fun- you will be a nervous wreck wondering whats going on at his.

Brandy.. Thank you very much on helping me with this issue, it has been driving me crazy...lol,
Hopfully he will take my advice and just go do something else. ...i dont care if he does to the bar w/ his guy friends.( as long nothen happend that invloves woman)
I think we could agree on something.
Thank you again.

I totally agree with you.. My fiancee and I have already had that discussion. I am not at all comfortable with the whole stripper thing. Your fiancee needs to take your feeling into consideration instead of his buddies. Dont let his friends make you feel like you are insecure or uptight. Just know that you are obviously a lot more mature than they are at the moment. Sit down with your fiancee without his friends around and let him know your feelings. He asked you to marry him, not his friends..Your feelings should come first.

I have the same concerns regarding my fiance`s bachelor party. I hate the thought of strippers etc and think that it`s a terrible way for guys to celebrate their mate`s commitment to one person. I also think most guys don`t think of the bachelor party as a fun send-off but as a legitmate excuse for getting drunk and seeing chicks stripping and more.
However, I too have run into problems with his friends saying where they are going to take him and what they are going to do. But I trust my partner and know that he wouldn`t do anything really bad. I`m also lucky in that he has some friends which will watch out for him and not let some of his other friends push things too far or push him into something he doesn`t want to do. Maybe you have a mutual friend who will be at the bachelor party that can watch out for him and control some of his other friends.
Of course they are going to have a bachelor party and probably see a stripper but I have told my fiance and some of his friends that if he so much as `touches` some chick, he`ll be having he`s wedding day without me. I have spoken to him about my concerns and I trust that he will respect me. Boys will be boys and there`s nothing you can do about it, but talk to your partner and surely he should consider and respect your wishes.

I know you might possibly be wondering why a male is in your post thread heh heh. As for males we wouldn`t be allowed to touch a stripper as opposed to a male stripper who females are perfectly allowed to touch. I personally don`t want a female stripper. I have seen many events and such with male strippers and I can bluntly say I don`t like what I see. However I am caught in a rut because my bride to be wants a male stripper... What do you suggest I do about this problem? I think this is a highly unfair and strange situation I have been placed into.

Hey Manda,
Your are 100% right. The party is a horribal idea. If he want`s to go to a club fine .. In a club there is NO TOUCHING! But a home or motel party is diffent. All the men get a "dip" into the product and the the groom-to-be get the pleasure and "fun" of letting him speam run free inside the stipper. My brother in-law has a child with a stipper. Please let your to-be-hubby know that you do not plan on having a STD or AIDS! Stand firm or kick him to the curb. All home parties are the same .. And anyone who says diffrent is lying! Have fun on the honeymoon?

Bachelor parties have gone to another level. What is the purpose of having strippers at the party? I would say no to it as well due to the fact that it is temptation from the so called friends that causes bad things to happen at these kind of functions. I would also concentrate on zeroing out his friends. They are no good talking in that manner and I would also curse them out and never have them over my place of residence. You go girl.

Nothing Wrong with Strippers at a bachelor Party just harmless entertainment.

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I have heard sooo many stories of what goes on at bachelor parties and you bet your bootie it won`t happen with my FH. My best friends brother`s both had parties and a lot or oral stuff went on. And others where they slept with them. No way, thats the reason we are having a jack n jill party. We will have guys and girls night out after the party but, the only way for a stipper then is in the club and they cant touch them there. I know my FH wouldn`t do anything, sober that is........now if he was drinking i don`t know. He doesn`t want a party anyways. And i don`t want a stipper. So we decided a Jack n Jill Party woud be best.

Mel

My guy is not having a stripper kinda party... We`ve talked about it before and he has said that this is just not the kind of thing that he wants to do. The conversation was a while ago and seeing all these posts on here made me want to talk to him again... The conclusion hasn`t changed (Boy was i greatful when we were talking about that!!) I guess my concern about the stripper issue would really be this: I`ve asked him not to have it. I`ve told him that i don`t like it and that it makes me feel like i`m being cheated on by the person who in a few short days is supposed to be making a lifetime committment to me. And yet after i`ve told him this he would still be considering taking this action that he knows would hurt me beyond belief?... That would scare me more than the thought of him getting blasted out of his minde and doing something inappropriate... It`s the fact that he knows that this sort of thing happens alot, it hurts me, and the he`s willing to take the chance anyway. My question would then be, how much concern and respect does he really have for me? what think of that line of thinking?

Honestly, if your husband doesn`t want you to have a stripper, then he has no business proclaiming rights to have one himself. God, what a huge double standard, not to mention, what a DUMBASS.

This is my view on strippers, whether in a bachelor party context or not. Would he ask a female friend, coworker, or acquaintance to take off her clothes and dance on him? Would he ask your sister to get naked and rub herself all over him? No? Then why is this considered cheating while paying a stranger to do the same thing is not? In my opinion, it is all CHEATING and it does not matter who the woman is or what the context is. It is CHEATING. I explained this to my bf and luckily when I put it that way he had to agree. There is still the matter of convincing his pigheaded friends (several of whom have actually cheated on their long term girlfriends) not to throw him a stripper bachelor party when we get married. He does have one friend who agrees with me and is trustworthy thank God!

By the way, here is a good rule of thumb. If he can`t do it with his sister or cousin, then it is cheating. Period.

I have been engaged 4 years and all along my fiance and I have decided to have a Jack and Jill party instead of a bachelor and bachelorette party w/ strippers. He does not go to the strippers and says that he has come to a point where he is going to do things that he feels he has missed out on or wants to do but wouldn`t do because he knows how I feel about them. The "things" he`s talking about in unsure of but strippers keep coming up. I am totally set against him going to strippers or having strippers at his bachelor party. I don`t understand why all of a sudden he`s changed his mind?? We haven`t even set a wedding date yet due to finances. But anyways, he knows I would never leave him if he saw strippers. I just dont think I can handle the thought of another woman putting her hands all over him and enticing him in a sexual way. I trust my fiance completely and know that he won`t get out of line. I wish he would take my feelings into consideration since he knows how strongly I am against the idea, but he said that I know his feelings on the subject and he is going to do it if he wants to. He said he shouldn`t have to suffer just because it`s something I don`t agree with. Every time it`s brought up we fight. Am I supposed to just deal with the fact that my fiance will have another womans body against his and that he is doing this knowing how hurt I will be?????? Anyone PLEASE help me

Dawn,
I can`t believe he would still go ahead and do that when you have told him how you felt. My fiance and i are having a jack n jill party, which is actually tomorrow. I thank goodness, lucked out; He doesn`t care about strippers and all that stuff. I can care less about them too. Your FH should consider your feelings towards everything, and if he knows if will hurt you or makes you feel uncomfortable; he should think twice before doing it.

Mel

I don`t have a problem with my fiance going to a local strip club...but, he wants to go 3 hours out of town for a weekend bachelor party. I am having a MAJOR problem with this. Personally, I think a weekend away with a bunch of his nasty friends is a mistake waiting to happen. I am going to be pretty hard core about this...if a private "stripper" comes to the condo or if he touches ANYTHING I will call off the wedding.

There is no harm in having a stripper. At least they dont want escorts strippers are classy and decent girls just trying to earn a decent living. They are not prostitutes so why worry.

Where do stripper parties and commitment meet? There is something backwards in the idea that BEFORE a MARRIAGE(of all things), a person is entitled to get a grind from some random person that they paid to see naked! A truly marriage or commitment minded person would not consider, before or during their marriage, having a stranger grope or sexually entice them. If your fiance is not the ONLY one you have choosen to sexually entice you(currently or in the future), you should consider waiting until you have truly discovered commitment and love before you walk down any church(or any other) isle and drag your poor unsuspecting spouse and future children down the road to a hellacious life, and finally a painful divorce. I can`t believe with discussions like these, people are at all shocked about the high rate of divorce or infidelity in this country!

All of these posts are by women who, in the first place, don`t TRUST thier husbands. If you don`t TRUST your husband in the first place, what the hell are you doing getting marrried? Seriously, isn`t it true that trust is the foundation for a marriage. If you don`t have that, then you are on a one way road to divorce or a very miserable marriage with kids that will really resent you, no matter how big of an Oprah watching, mrs. Brady brownie baker,susie home-maker you think you are. It will end with many casualties. If your FH, wants a party with his buds, then let him be, but if you think he`s a playa`,then he probably is. He may not get to do it that night, but he will eventually. (oh yes he will) So stick that in your boquet and toss it.
Ciao,
Chico