2ND MARRIAGE

I too am getting married for the second time to someone whom had never been married before, I wanted to go to vegas or a justice of the peace but he wanted a family affair. I guess to cut costs I know from having a big wedding the first time what is important to me and what wasn`t. I am doing my own invitations, we are getting married in his parents yard, short and sweet and putting our money into a big reception party. I am not putting a lot of money into the cake and decorations (we bought a lot of lights on clearance after christmas). We want good food and entertainment. Also for a ring, I know some people don`t like this, but I got mine at a local pawn shop after a lot of researching. He paid $400 for it and when I had it appraised at a retailer it appraised for $2800. It depends on what is important to you!!!

I am getting married for the 2nd time also in less than a month. I am 34, and my hubby-to-be is 36 (he has never married before). My first wedding was a long time ago, in 1991, and my priorities are so different now with our home and family. We are having a very elegant and intimate ceremony and dinner at a very nice restaurant with a total of about 35 guests attending. I love the idea of truly having ONLY those nearest and dearest to us, and knowing that this will be such a classy and memorable afternoon/evening. There will be no dance, but I have compiled a custom CD that the proprietor has gladly agreed to play during the event for ceremony music and dinner/background music. The restaurant is bending over backwards for us. It normally opens to the public at 5pm, but they are allowing us and our guests to have our ceremony with possible speeches to follow at 3:30 so the really personal and private parts of the ceremony will be just that. The restaurant is fairly large and our group will be separated from most of the rest of the restaurant to still ensure a personal space. We are having a minister conduct the ceremony, and then a lovely dinner. (Incidentally with a choice of 6 different entrees for each person!!) What a change from the traditional meal where there are so many individual tastes and preferences and you have basically 1 or 2 items to choose to serve everyone. We are thrilled, and I truly think that this will be one of the nicest evenings we will ever experience.

I am 26 and getting married for the second and last time on July5th. I do not have a ring yet but will this weekend. We found it at Sears on a clearance of 60% off! It ended up being $220 and it totals 1/4 ct. Fine for me since he promised that on our second anniversary he will put a bigger one on my finger, that isn`t important to me. Many people have huge rings with no love. I don`t want that. He has never been married before so his mother is going crazy with the wedding. Inviting many people, on the other hand I have a huge family which in order not to hurt feeling I had to invite. I simply put "no gifts please" on the invitations. Since they all bought for the first one, less that 4 years ago.
I have alot of mixed feelings on how to go about the second wedding. But remember it is your choice and you choudl come to an agreement on it. Maybe you both have to give in a little. We all know that the entire marriage will be full of those situations.
Good Luck and congrats!

This is also my second marriage and I felt no gifts were necessary, either. I told my family that their presence was present enough. My first was a very simple no-frills deal, so I am actually having fun (I know, I`m warped a bit) planning a nice wedding. This is my fiancee`s first, so I am having a great time getting a gown (it`s Ivory, not white, pass it on...), and planning a great party for our family and friends. My parents are delighted I`m with a super guy and that I`m doing it right and celebrating this in a way that makes us happy. I`ve had the rudest people comment on why I`m doing all of this for a second marriage and tell me what is appropriate and what isn`t.

I started all the planning with the intent of getting a simple cream dress and an officiant and maybe a nice dinner. My fiancee asked why i was keeping it low key and didn`t we have something we wanted to celebrate? We sure do and it is amazing how much support we`ve received from our families. We`re paying for all of this ourselves, naturally, and we decided to spend our budget on the reception. Because we want everyone to have a great time with us.
I wish all of you 2nd brides the best! Did i mention what a great time I`m having with this? Even the vendor contract disputes and seating arrangements? i am! Really!

I think I got carried away in my last post, so sorry. My point I never reached was that even though we are having a bigger wedding than I originally planned, we are doing it oh so very cheaply. And we both are getting what we wanted:

We negotiated the cost of our reception and are having less than 75 guests. We selected a day in August which gave us a discount because it is considered off season. (Friday evening affairs are cheaper, too. Also, consider having a cocktail and hors`d`oevres reception instead of dinner.)
Employ friends and family. My family put me in touch with a DJ and photographer after attempts of getting my on were too costly and too nervewracking.
My gown was from E-bay and is beautiful and simple and was $200. No veil. Just a nice tiara. $15.
Making my own flowers (sure hope they don`t look too bad) from Michael`s Crafts. Cheap, easy, and they`ll last forever because I don`t think they`ll break down in the landfill.
Centerpieces are pictures of us throughout the years on each table.
Wedding bands: Sears. They`re really nice, they`re guaranteed, they`re gold, what a deal. Why spend more now? And we will always love our Sears wedding bands.
Invitations were ordered from invitations4less.com (They were cheap, they made the wording look really good and I couldn`t be more pleased) . If I had a good printer, or knew someone that did, i would`ve made them myself.

I hope this helps!

If he wants the frills, make HIM pay for it.