My Fiancee Left Me!!! Help (sob)

Ryan-

I see something in your messages that needs to be respected--by others and by you. You are at the center of this pain, not anyone else. It is yours alone, and though it can be triggered by your fiancee, it has nothing to do with her as a person now. She is living her life somewhere else, you are living your life where you are. Your life is your creation. You can feel your pain, in some ways I think that is healthy. But your recovery, your management of your time, emotions, life, it is all you. Your choices and responsibilty. Your pain is not your fiancees fault but your choice. Sometimes pain can help us in life. So use it to your benefit; we don`t always get the chance to be so drawn in to the inner workings of our souls. But, be careful how you use this experience in your interactions with others: with this new girl, with the people on this blog.

You met someone else; that will not take care of your pain. It may distract you and bring new joy into your life, but your healing will progress at its own pace and you need to respect that process, not give into many people who advise you to "move on."

My own fiancee left me April 12th; it was three weeks before our wedding was scheduled. I have `moved on,` living in new place, new work, meeting new people. Many exciting things in my life now. But the feelings still come sometimes about Catherine and i have to respect their appearance, otherwise the healing will just be suppressed and later come out perhaps more strongly.

I just started to see a therapist once a week, and I think it will be good. Because despite all the distractions and wonderful things I can do now, I realize I am still processing and need someone who will really listen and hear and give feedback. Most people in your life will not care enough to listen for very long. Their patience wears thin, as you can see by the people who respond here.

I wish you well. I have written about some of my processing at www.andywrites.org; I don`t know if that will be helpful for you. But I wish you the best; please continue to respect yourself and the healing you need, and don`t allow the pain to fool you into hurting yourself or anyone else.

Peace,
Andy

Omg I just met the woman of my dreams! She is so beautiful and so smart, my heart almost exploded when she kissed me! I`m so glad I didn`t marry the other girl!! Thank you all so much for your support, (almost) everyone has been so kind and shown great compassion for me.
::doing happy dance::
Thank you all, goodbye!!