Distant Families And No Money

This is a tough one, but there are solutions that you can work out. Option one: Have the full wedding in his home town, invite everyone you would want to come and let them decide if they can make their budgets stretch to come (you might be surprised by what people will do if they have enough time to plan and prepare). Option two: Have a small desitnation wedding where only a few people are invited and they al pay the same amount to tavel to the location (airlines will give you discounts for wedding travle if you ask, and most hotels will give you a group rate for rooms... Negotiate!) Option three: Have a small wedding at home, and then a second wedding where his family lives. Neither of these would be large events, but everyone would be able to be involved and feel special. Have your parents pay for the one at home and you&your fiance/his parents pay for the one in his hometown(that might mean that it is a potluck with candid photos taken by guests, and flowers picked from friends garndens... This can turn out beautiful with a litte work).
The main thing you have to decide is "What is important to me?" is it important to you to have everyone together, everyone there, or just special people? Did you dream about a big white expensive wedding, or can you think outside the box and find ways of cutting costs. Are you willing to negotiate with vendors to get what you need, and then leave decisions up to your guests? This is YOUR Wedding, and time for you and your future husband to celebrate your union to each other. It needs to be special for you.
I do think it is unfair for your parents to fully pay for a wedding that only they (out of your family members) can attend, I also think it is wrong for them to take on the responsibility of your fiance`s parent`s travel expenses and lodging... You parents are already shelling out for the entire event. Hope this helps

Since your family has alittle more than his, then just have the wedding in his hometown. Have your family travel to wherever his family is. I know that you don`t want to put your family in a bind, but this is a wedding and it is expensive either way it go. For once, since his family can`t seem to meet you half way on things, then just do what you have to do to get your families together.

I just had the same situation, I got married in my home town and had a reception and did the same in his home town with his family. I didn`t have anyone choose. I got married in the church I was baptised in at home and we did the same at his home town. I felt lucky because what bride can say that they wore their gown two times? I was very happy to get married in the Church at my home, since we are both in the military I had a chance for my salute and he wore full Marine uniform while I wore my gown. I had the same things at both reception so I figured that there was 75 invited to each wedding so we bought things in bulk and had half shipped to both addresses. It was fine. I didn`t make anyone travel and everyone was happy.