Location

Me and my fiance are from different states. My hometown is 5 states away from his. We live in his home state though. I was trying to figure out where the wedding should be held. Either way some of our family will have to travel. We would both really like to have our families there for our wedding. I was thinking of having it in the city we live and fly my family in, but it would be really expensive for us. ANd if we have each guest pay their own way, i know alot of them couldnt afford to come. Between plane tickets and hotels it would be a small fortune for us to pay for about 40 people. Do airlines and hotels give discounts for large groups? ANy ideas would be greatly appreciated.