Suggestions For Asking Dad To Help Pay?
Okay, I know this is a touchy subject. But my fiancee and I are having a small wedding on a VERY limited budget. My family has not offered one stitch of help. I don`t expect this from my Mom, as I know she has no extra money at all right now. My dad, however, is very comfortable financially and could easily afford to pitch in at least a few hundred dollars. I have not asked him to help pay for this, and up until now, my fiancee and I have assumed that we would be paying for everything ourselves. It will be tight, but we are committed to do this for our families. Enter my stepmother. She has started inviting all her friends, family members, etc., and added more than just a few people to our list, without my consent. She knows as well as my father that we are on an extremely strict budget. I would kind-of like to ask them to contribute something to help with the cost, but don`t know how to approach the situation without coming across as the typical, money-grabbing, "daddy should pay for everything at my wedding" bridezilla... Because that`s not where I`m coming from on this. I just want some help accomodating the overage they`re creating.
Does anyone have any suggestions on how I might approach this with them? Believe me, I`m already resigned to the fact that I won`t see a dime from them, but would like any advice anyone has to offer on how I might at least talk to them about it without creating a family scandal.
Thank you!
Posted by Suzanne; updated 05/23/05
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Um, I think the Dad should help pay. Definitely. He should at least pitch in to cover the cost of the guests that his wife is inviting!
Posted by MoonBride; updated 05/24/05
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But how do I talk to him/them about it without being offensive or coming across as "entitled"? Any suggestions?
Posted by Suzanne; updated 05/24/05
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Just sit them down and let them know you have noticed that they have a few extra people on the list that you were not planning on and need to trim it down a bit. Have them divide it up into three sections. 1-must invite (this includes family members) 2-should invite (people that are really close to you but not family members) 3-would like to invite (everyone else). You might be able to narrow it down a little more than what it is. Let them know that their list will be incorporated into yours......and not all of them might make it on the final list. But it`s not because you don`t want them there...it`s just that it`s out of your budget. Let them know that you will do everything in your powers to include them. If they insist everyone needs to be invited then politely ask for assistance. Just let them know that you are willing to include them if they are willing to help just a tiny bit.......point out that you have not asked them to help financially and wouldn`t if it was not necessary. You are just asking them for a little help...not paying for the entire thing. You need to also remember that not everyone that is invited attends....that will give you a little break too. Good luck!!
Posted by Leslie; updated 05/25/05
