Can`t Afford A Wedding
I come from a single mother family - so my mom can`t help wth the wedding and I wouldn`t expect her too - she doesn`t have money - I don`t really have any other financial sources aside from myself - same with my boyfriend - we can`t even afford rings, etc. Right now. We want to get married in the next two years but will only be able to afford some rings (just average) and to pay off student loans, etc. By then. I`ll be 30 in the summer - I don`t want to have to save for years to get married - but I don`t want to disappoint friends - I have so many who want me to have a wedding and I just don`t have the money although I would love to. They all talk about open bar - dinners - I`ve heard people complain of other tacky weddings and crap weddings - I don`t want to hold one on a very tight budget and have people not understand and complain later. I shouldn`t care what people think but I do care - is it rude to have a very private ceremony or elope? How do you annouce this without sounding like a poor me I can`t afford it - or a suck - how do you politely say it`s not possible financially right not and have people truly understand. I`m not cheap I am very generous but don`t have another few thousand right now to spare. Help!
Posted by Lori; updated 07/29/04
Reply
You really shouldn`t worry about making anybody happy except yourself. I know you want to make you friends impressed or whatever but this is your day. Do what makes you happy~ not your friends. But I don`t think charging people to attend your wedding is a good idea. I think it would be romantic to go up the the mountains- just you and your honey- and get married at night when it`s snowing under the stars. All you need is someone to marry y`all. And then whenever y`all get on y`alls feet then you can throw a fancy renewal thing.
Posted by Ashley; updated 07/29/04
Reply
We are in a similar boat financially. So.. Instead of having your "typical" wedding reception, we are having a ceremony at 7:30 and then a dessert/champagne reception. We are having an assortoment of desserts (as well as cheese for all those non-carb folks), with beer, wine and our "signature" cocktail. Because the wedding is so late, the reception will not begin until 8:30, therefore it will only last a couple hours so the liquor cost and consumption will also be below norm. We won`t pay nearly as much as we would with a full meal and we will still be have to an open bar - so to speak.
We are also saving money by not hiring a DJ - there really isnt much time or room. Its just more of a cocktail reception.
Posted by Kel; updated 07/30/04
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The wedding is for you and your husband-to-be. Don`t plan a wedding trying to make other people happy. If you can`t afford a wedding, so what? Don`t have a wedding. Get married in front of your minister, priest, or rabbi with just your witnesses. Wear a nice dress and have a potluck afterwards. People who complain about other peoples` weddings aren`t worth worrying about. I wouldn`t put off getting married because you can`t afford a lavish wedding. Get married right now (if that`s what you want) and go on with your life from there. Life`s too short. A "perfect" wedding doesn`t ensure a perfect life. Just do the best you can.
Posted by Ellie; updated 07/31/04
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Run away to Vegas or a JP and get married with your closest family in tow...then when you have a few hundred bucks to spare, have a small party to celebrate with other friends and family--even if it`s a year down the line. Good luck!
Posted by Amanda; updated 08/04/04
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Lori, I wedding is a special day that you will remember for the rest of your life, but it doesn`t have to be expensive. Have it in a back yard, with sandwiches you made yourself. Set up a CD Player and play some CD`s. You can get a beautiful dress online or in a retail store for very cheap. And just get some plain wedding bands from walmart until one day you can replace it for something better. A ring is a reminder and a display, it doesn`t have to cost 1000 or even 200 dollars. I know some really great ideas for a very inexpensive wedding completly according to your OWN buget. Email me with a budget if you`d like some ideas. NextWorldAngel@hotmail.com
Posted by Summer; updated 08/18/04
