Get It Off Of Your Chest

Brandy,
Do you have the url`s of the other threads you have visited?

IMO, its Linda (who posts under various names) who is making these boards so hostile.

Aahhh...venting. I do realize that some people wholeheartedly offer their honest opinions, and that is to be comended. Sometimes the truth hurts, and since we are all on here asking for suggestions, we should take what we ask for....BUT, there is a way to offer your advice and opinion in a positive way. There is no need for criticizing , name-calling, and just plain rudeness. We are here with one purpose in mind--to get married in the best way possible. If you can`t give advice in a constructive way, then go somewhere else. Period. Thanks, Brandy. I needed to vent more than I realized.

Anytime! You ought to go to weddingchannel.com and read some of them on there! It was great to tell my "grandmother" and I use that term VERY loosely,as she is my dad`s step-mother and a mean and bitter person, exactly what I thought if her and the s@*t she pulls all the time. And I could do it without causing more problems in the family.

You know, I am so tired of hearing about religion. Not that it is a bad thing, but everybody has a different religion and a different belief. Why is it everytime you ask a question, somebody has to drag religion into it! I did not relaize this was a church board, I thought it was to get ideas and tips on planning weddings, which not all are religious!
There is the religious part and the government part of a marriage right? It is the government part that requires us to have a piece of paper saying we are legally married, religion only requires us to say our vows. Why is it that if we don`t have a piece of paper (government) then we are religiously sinning.
If my FH and I stood in the middle of the woods with nobody around or maybe a few friends and said maritial vows, would that not make us religiously married. All the paper is, is proof for the government so they know how to tax you.
Back in the day, even B.C., did they have a paper saying they were married or were they just surrounded by family and loved ones and stated their vows.
I am just trying to figure out if state and religion are supposed to be seperated, how does that affect marriage and why do I need a piece of paper saying I belong to my FH and not be able to go by just our words. It is a concept to think about.

You can have a civil wedding at the Justice of the Peace office, or a religious marriage in a church. Either one is legally binding.

I have replied to post where I felt my religious background was helpful not to say hey everyone this is me but to get my point across and I hop it helped for those of you who read them.

Anyway, I must admit I do truly need to vent. It amazes me that we woman are so unsupportive of each other. Just because we do not agree with the decisions and choices we do not need to bash them. Then the excuse is always “this is an opinion board or they asked for the advice” but if you really read the post many times your opinion is not relevant to the post at all. A question such as were can I find a wishing well has lead to all kind of disputes to name calling and the question again was where can she find a particular wishing well. If you do not know simply don’t answer what is so hard about that. Or something like a child being called a bastard is never acceptable to any question but again the question there was “for ways she can include her child in the ceremony” If you do not agree simply do not answer. This is supposed to be helpful not hurtful information so even when the post does ask for advice DO WE REALLY HAVE TO BE SO RUDE & NASTY??? If a friend or relative asked these same questions would our answer be so harsh?

I`ve been criticized, here, and also by people I know, for not having my wedding in a church. It is just awful for people to criticize your choice on this. My husband and I don`t even go to church on a regular basis anyway. Another thing is, I don`t like church buildings at all. They feel empty and cold to me.

Exactly! I go to church once in awhile and my kids go with my mom but we are not regular attenders so a religious ceremony seems kinda hypocritical, we do have a youth minister as a mutual friend that is going to do our ceremony w/o all of the religion.
I too, have noticed that alot of the post have nothing to do with the question asked and end up with rude comments. If I seem to stray off of the subject, I at least stay kind and polite, except to Linda sometimes.
There are some days where I get absolutely NOTHING out of this board and it seems like a waste of time. BUT, I realize for the most part there are kind women on here that are helpful and I keep coming back.
I could sit and vent about a few other things as well but am feeling lazy at the moment. GL to you ladies

I am also in need of a good vent! I looked into these message boards for ideas and good advice, not to be knocked down with smart remarks and sometimes foul language. I do thank all the people that had nice ideas and politely responded when I needed help! Thanks and let`s all have wonderful weddings!!!!

Adriana

I find it ironic you called me silly & proper for making a similar comment when trying to support another soon to be bride when she was being insulted for absolutely no good reason.

Ladies I am highly PO`d at my FH today and I swear if things do not change soon, I am calling it quits! You would think after almost 9 yrs we would be able to buy a home, oh no we get to rent a really nice duplex with a troll of a landlord! He just got a new, much higher paying job almost 2 months ago, but instead of being able to save the difference in the paycheck like we had planned, somehow or another the ass is putting the account in the negitive! Since my name is not on the account, there is not a lot I can do at the moment but he insist it it all my fault, that I spen more money than him. WOW in over 2 weeks I have spent 17.00 on household stuff like lightbulbs, trashbags, ect! Walmart allows me to use his bank card.
We owe so much money from years ago, when we first had our first son who is almost 8 now! AND he owes 10,000 in student loans that I have been telling him for 6 yrs, he should have paid a little each month but NO let`s not listen to me, now they are in default.
He wonders why I won`t marry him now. UMMM... Student loan and 2 car loans, one repossesion. We have been together since high school and it seems when things start going great for us something else happens and screws us all over again.
We were planning on using our income tax money to get everything paid off and start fresh, but no H&R Block messed up our taxes a few years back and he now owes the IRS and they owe me but refuse to pay, so I have to sue them. Well by the time I get done paying for a lawyer, it would be a waste of time, any money i got back would be going to him/her. I am so frusterated with him right now. I cannot wait until all of my paperwork is approved and I can sign my papers for the Air Force and leave. 12 weeks of hard labor is going to be vacation time for me. Plus a few thousand dollars!